Day 22 – Why I Started To Hate Date Nights With My Wife

Day 22


John 8: 31-32


Date nights. When you first meet someone, you can’t wait for the next one.

And that’s supposed to carry on into marriage, right? Well sure.

In fact, my wife Toni and I made it a priority to have a regular date night every week – even when our kids were young.

But after a few years into our marriage, I came to resent them. In fact, we hit a point in our relationship where I tried to do everything I could to avoid them. I don’t like to admit it, but it’s true.


Because our date nights were starting to be taken over by difficult conversations. Every time we sat down, we’d have to wade into issues I’d rather have avoided.  I’d have to look at the truth – about me and about us.

By God’s grace, we pressed on. We got some outside counseling to help, and we moved through the difficult conversations, and we came out on the other side so much better.

When I faced the truth, it set me (and us) free.

As a result, our date nights have never been better and our relationship has never been stronger.

Ever notice: The greatest transformations often come from the toughest conversations?

Now another question. Could that also be true in your relationship with God?

There are some things you just don’t want to talk about with God. Over the next week, we’ll touch down on one of those subjects — hell.

It’s a subject almost all of us would love to avoid.

But what if there was something in there for you? What if even transformation was on the other side?

Jesus said that truth will set us free. Are you willing to believe that? Could the truth about the afterlife really set you free?

Sometimes the greatest transformation comes from the toughest conversations. Are you willing to have a conversation that might somehow lead to transformation?


Belong – Because you can belong before you believe.
Is there anything you don’t want to talk to God about? What might that tell you?

Believe – Because those who belong often start to believe.
Could a deeper relationship be on the other side of a tough conversation with God?

Become – Because those who believe can become someone new.
What subjects are still off limits between you and God? Is hell one of them? Any idea why?

God, there is so much about truth that scares us. And yet today I want to believe your promise that the truth will set me free. Help me to embrace truth as I embrace you.

– By Carey Nieuwhof


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